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Bob Wilson's Wikipedia, Player Profiles, Subculture

Bob Wilson’s Wikipedia – Week Five

Welcome to Bob Wilson’s Wikipedia

Wikipedia has changed the educational landscape as we know it. Gone are the days when knowledge was gained through dusty encyclopedias and local wisdom, hearsay and rumourmongering.

Nowadays, people simply need to access Wikipedia in order to pass off facts as their own, plagiarise beyond all means in academia, sully the reputation of Hollywood movie stars – all in the name of ‘free education for all’.

Wikipedia’s framework is built on the Wikimedia Commons project – a media file repository making available‘public domain and freely-licensed educational media content’ – that is, no ‘copyrighted’ content.

Which is why we see Bob Wilson, a Scottish international goalkeeper, a man with more than 230 Arsenal appearances under his belt, a respected television broadcaster, paying for petrol in Hatfield, Hertfordshire as his official Wikipedia photograph. He isn’t the only one however. There are many, many more…

Here are five of the best that were submitted this week, in no particular order:

John Oster

John Oster (@MattTickner)

Spotted by @MattTickner

John Morgan Oster (born 8 December 1978) is an English born Welsh international footballer, who plays as a midfielder for Football League Championship club Doncaster Rovers.

Oster progressed through the youth ranks at Grimsby Town before moving on to Premier League Everton. He went on to feature for Sunderland and Barnsley before returning to Grimsby on loan, from there on he has also featured with Leeds United, Burnley, Reading and Crystal Palace.

Now this has to be one of the most difficult images of Bob Wilson’s Wikipedia to date. We think that’s John Oster, but the distance and depth of field don’t help to identify him. But who would lie on Wikipedia right?

Des Walker

Des Walker (@TheYoungMcmahon)

Spotted by @theyoungmchmahon

Desmond Sinclair “Des” Walker (born 26 November 1965 in Homerton, London) is a former England international footballer who is best remembered for his spells with Nottingham Forest and Sheffield Wednesday.

Forgetting his solitary season in Serie A, and remembering more his 59 caps for England, he is considered one of the best defenders to play in English football.

We’ve seen that look before. Remember El Diego looking forlorn, alone in a restaurant. Well here we see Des looking depressed and upset, which leads us to only one conclusion. El Diego and Des Walker have gone to separate restaurants – a crying shame – it would have been a lovely date.

Jason Puncheon

Jason Puncheon (@Jimmydan)

Spotted by @Jimmydan

Jason David Ian Puncheon (born 26 June 1986 in Croydon, Greater London) is an English professional footballer who is currently contracted to Queens Park Rangers.

He is able to play on the left or right wing and sometimes plays just behind the striker. Following his goal against Everton on his Blackpool debut on 5th February 2011, he has scored in every division of English league football, scoring for Barnet in League Two, Milton Keynes Dons and Southampton in League One, Millwall in the Championship and Blackpool in the Premier League.

Having featured in the League Two PFA Team of the Year in 2007–08 and the League One PFA Team of the Year in 2009–10, Puncheon has established himself as a decent lower-league striker, which his journeyman status (he’s at his 10th club at the age of only 25) belies.

What is it about Bob Wilson’s Wikipedia and people with their shirt off? Remember the absolute stonker of Louis Briscoe from Week One? However, we see here Puncheon celebrating wildly to a crowd, who have managed to take, although blurry and ill-framed, quite a decent photograph in the ensuing meleé. Kudos to you.

Bent Christensen

Bent Christensen (@TheYoungMcmahon)

Spotted by @TheYoungMcmahon

Bent Christensen Arensøe, formerly known as Bent René Christensen, (born January 4, 1967) is a Danish former professional football (soccer) player who has been part of the coaching team at Brøndby IF since 2005.

During his active career he earned the nickname “Turbo” for his tenacity in the attacking striker position. He played in a string of clubs, most notably Danish club Brøndby IF, where he scored a combined 116 goals in 208 games and won five Danish championships.

Arensøe played 26 games and scored 8 goals for the Denmark national football team, and was a part of the Danish winning team who shocked Europe at the 1992 European Championship.

There is something quite remarkable about this photograph, but yet I can’t work out what it is. It maybe the way it looks like a portrait of a footballer from the 1950s, it may be the technique he is showing (quite the step-over follow-through), or maybe that the ball looks superimposed. But then look in the background, before the luscious green trees – he are the people that Arensøe is meant to be coaching, rather than dicking around with a photographer. Poor form.

Thomas Haessler

Thomas Haessler (@TheYoungMcmahon)

Spotted by @TheYoungMcMahon

Thomas Häßler (born 30 May 1966 in West Berlin) is a former German football midfielder and is currently a coach for 1. FC Köln. He was formerly a coach for the Nigeria national team.

Häßler spent his early playing days in the youth team of Reinickendorfer Füchse. He began his professional career in 1984 with 1. FC Köln of the Bundesliga, for whom he played six successful years, helping the club to become German vice-champion in 1989 and 1990. Soon after winning the 1990 World Cup with the German national team in Italy, Häßler transferred to Juventus for a sum of DM15 million. He spent only one year in Turin before he decided to join another Italian club, AS Roma, for a fee of DM14 million.

A longing to return to the Bundesliga saw Häßler join Karlsruher, before a season at Borussia Dortmund and eventually Bayern Munich. A year in Austria with SV Salzburg came and went and Häßler retired from the game in 2004. Winning 101 caps and scoring 11 goals, Häßler was part of the Germany team who won the 1990 World Cup and Euro ’96.

A particularly strong entry to finish this week – we see Thomas Häßler, a midfield mainstay of a very successful period in German footballing history, jogging around a tree. Now, who was there at this exact moment to take this photo, that’s the question.

As this is a weekly feature, if you spot a funny Wikipedia image of a professional footballer, be sure to let us know by email or Twitter, with the subject or hashtag #BobWilsonsWiki.

We will publish five of the best each week. Find the whole collection of Bob Wilson’s Wikipedia here.

Follow @MattTickner on Twitter.

You can also follow The Dubious Goals Committee on Twitter and ‘Like us’ on Facebook.

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We are The Dubious Goals Committee. We are just kicking our heels until the next 'dubious goal' is scored. This blog is the result...


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